Recap Modotti
2004-01-12 � 4:50 p.m.

I have been Summoned to the bar to voice my opinion about the behavior of some of my coworkers last Friday. I hate this crap, because I don't want to end up in the middle of things, but I also know that no one else there has any idea what really went on, and I need to make sure the right people are held accountable. Not that I want them to get in trouble, but better the blame lay with the correct person than the incorrect one.

Right?

So many people are such bad managers. Not that being a manager is easy — it certainly isn't — but there are some real common sense portions of doing it that most people never seem to grasp. I guess that's because most people have little common sense at all. Maybe I am lucky. Maybe I just intuitively understand some of these things better than other people. Maybe I learned some of it through exposure (both of my parents have been in management positions for as long as I can remember, and my mother was the Human Resources director for her company for years).

And, no offense intended to my gender, but men are usually worse managers than women (in my limited experience). For men, it's always about confrontation. Agression. Domination. It turns into power games. It's gross.

And that's what I am dealing with now. Gross male power games. People who should know better using their position to both bolster their ego and to lash out at those they find threatening.

And maybe I am no better. Because, while I do find myself righteously indignant at this behavior, concerned for the effect that it is having on the business, and am genuinely worried for the employee who is receiving the brunt of this craziness, part of me revels in the fact that the person who has been behaving this way is going to get slapped down, hard, and it's going to be me that does it.

*sigh*

Humans. No wonder the world is in such a state.

Also, I am lonely (yes, still, and probably forever). I'm not sure why it galls me to admit that. It tastes bad coming out of my mouth (I know I'm not actually speaking the words, but it still applies). It's like the ultimate admission of weakness, to admit to being lonely. I don't understand why, but I feel that it is so. Am I wrong in this assumption?

Things over at LiveJournal are messed up. I somehow got involved in the disintegration of the friendship between two people, only come to find out not really, because one of them is CRAZY. But all of her little sycophants don't really know that, so now I am hated by people as far away as Toronto for saying things like, "Friends don't have to agree with each other 100% of the time." Because, apparently, friendship means being unquestioningly supportive of each other for every minute of every day, otherwise you are obviously out to destroy the other pserson's personality and drag them down into a pit of despair to be mocked and spit upon while you point and laugh and drink champagne and degrade women and kill cats. (I am only slightly exaggerating.) LiveJournal sucks, sometimes.

I was also talked into joining the Friendster. I don't really get it, but I joined because I was told that I should. And now my ego is just so boosted by having a grand total of...one friend. *sniffle* Still, it isn't like I have put any effort into it at all. Because, like I said, I don't get it. And the site is so slow it takes years off my life to load some of the pages.

Doubtless there is some work I need to be doing, so I shall sign off before I get caught not doing it.

-t

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